Saturday 24th September 2016
Kent County League
By Luke Johnson
New lads done good!
Ah, I've missed these.
It's been a while, so in a few words here's what's happened.
We won the league. Everyone was buzzing to stay. Everyone left. To play for Lewisham Boro. And Crockenhill (Rannndallll). Thanks lads.
After a month or so out, I can't possibly make a comment that our best result of the season so far was indeed our best performance. I am also, in no way, making any correlation between me returning from injury and us beating a top of the league who hadn't lost all season, conceding just 3 goals. I wouldn't do that.
Borden Village looks a lovely place. Nice pubs, nice shops and a save our village from development poster. They also grow giants down in Borden. We were giving away almost a foot to all but one of their starting 11.
Upon arrival we were greeted by Andy's luminous new polo shirt. It's a shocking bit of clobber. The excuse of "I didn't know it would be so yellow" didn't cut the mustard with the boys.
Walking into the changing room I swiftly realised I didn't know anybody. It's hard to make friends at my age, so it was all a bit daunting.
Late drop outs meant a few changes to our 4-3-3 line up.
Andy made me captain, which was a fantastic decision. Thankfully Aaron was on hand to help remind me what to do at the beginning, I forgot everything.
Kicking against a decent breeze and pretty big slope, the first half was always going to be a battle. Borden controlled the game for the first 20 minutes as we struggled to get any kind of foothold. Their goal was a disappointing one to give away, a long ball over the top and, to be fair, a cracking lob from their striker from an angle over Gibbo.
For a team with so many new players, playing together for the first time, it was always going to take time to settle and understand each other's game. This happened on about half hour when we realised Dekklund (or Duncan as Gibbo called him) was red hot. For the next 15 minutes we just passed it to Dekklund and let him get on with it. At one point he was clattered for a stonewall pen, that for some reason was overlooked by the officials.
Our equaliser quickly came. Dan Rose, the scruffy imbecile, got on the end of a quality front post corner to head home. Good header to be fair.
Frankie had to come off injured in the first half, and we unleashed Chris Pogba (Hassan) in his place. At half-time I had to come off as well, and Andrew replaced me at CB.
Second half was a joy to watch. We totally dominated all the way through the team. Dekklund scored our second goal from an impossible angle, unbelievable finish from the boy.
Our 3rd was a move containing at least 15 passes, front to back, finished with a great header from Pogba following Malachi's pin point cross. The second and third goals may well be the other way round, it's Thursday now and I'm senile, but that's how they happened.
My personal highlight of the game was Andy's playground spat with the referee. A verbal exchange that definitely included the lines
"One more and you're off"
"Ooohh, I'm scared"
"You should be"
It stopped one step from the pair of em telling each other that they were gonna get their dads down.
Me and Frankie missed the last 15 minutes of the game as we were watching a stunt plane do its stuff.
George was probably MOM in my opinion, but Dekklund ran him close on that front. Talking of George, he thinks it's perfectly OK to leave rubbish in people's cars and get them to drop him off 15 miles from where he says he lives. Not cool George.
In all seriousness a quality result with a new look side and a lot of players unavailable. Onwards and upwards, to a HOME game next week!!
Gibbo; Harry Tanner, LJ, New Lad, New Lad; Dan Rose; New Lad, New Lad; Aaron; New Lad, New Lad
New Lad, New Lad
Man of the match: New Lad